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Top 5 Reasons You DON’T Need a Professional Organizer (PG-13)

The Top 5 Reasons You Probably DON’T Need a Professional Organizer (PG-13 & a little sarcastic)

  1. You know your stuff.

True. Nobody knows your stuff better than you. It’s taken a lifetime to accumulate your stuff, it’s an impressive collection, and you’ve sensibly curated it with the loving intention of a true connoisseur. Not only do you absolutely covet every last chapstick, hair-tie, and grandma silver soup ladle in your possession – you’re certain (without a shred of doubt) that every item supports who you want to be and what you want to do before you’re dead and gone. You’re right. All that sh!t truly is important. Your life is better because of it. Congratulations. You’re awesome.

  1. You know your space.

Without question. Your home is exceptional; there’s nothing like it – anywhere. Your walls, your floors, your closets, shelves, drawers, cupboards, cabinets, crawl spaces, nooks, and crannies are very special.  And, nobody understands the unusual dynamic between you and your stuff, and how everything fits together better than you (not even a trained professional renowned for life-transformational interior design.) You’ve strategically scrutinized what you want to do with your life and how you want to feel in your space, and you’re confident you and your family are already maximizing your spaces’ potential to deliver on every square inch you’re paying for. Your streamlined aerodynamic lifestyle is a miracle of nature. Any semblance of clutter is intentionally staged. You’ve got sensibilities that inform your unique aesthetic. You’re a g*ddamn genius.

  1. You know your family.

Nobody understands the unique nuances of your family dynamic better than you. The members of your household are organizational ninjas, already executing the most effective strategies for peak performance and optimal outcomes. Thoughtful, easy-to-implement time and task management systems are already in place to guarantee everyone is reliably showing up on time, every day, prepared for success. Proven-effective methods for daily communication, conflict resolution, and advanced personal enrichment are already humming in perfect harmony. No doubt, your toddler, kindergartener, middle-schooler, teenager, spouse, sibling, mother-in-law, and grandmother agree. You are a finely-tuned, perfectly cohesive family unit, operating in complete harmony. You’re all wizards – because everyone knows, awesome is hereditary.

  1. You don’t like people telling you what to do.

Course not. Professional consultants are blowhards. And you’ve got everything under control. Who needs a Type-A, obsessive compulsive organizational neat freak coming into your space, telling you what’s what. You’ve got everything under control. You know exactly what you’re doing and every morning you spring out of bed in your perfectly pressed pajamas, ready to attack the day like the boss you are. You don’t need someone telling you how to organize your fridge, fold your underwear, clear your so-called clutter, or transform your garage into the immaculate envy of your zip code. You’re a free-thinking, innovative, ass-kicking, uber-organized, yogi, Zen master. You’re motherf*cking Han Solo and you got this!

  1. Who has the time (and) it costs too much.

(This one’s a two-fer.) Your life is in perfect balance. You are a leaf on the wind. But with all the Zen master bad-assery going on in your life already, who has time to workshop the kinks that occasionally slip through the cracks? Besides, everyone knows hyper-intensive work blocks of ultra-focused time spent with a seasoned professional project-guru are over-rated. Pay for a professional organizer? And dip into your shop-therapy, daily mocha-almond-frappuccino latte, all-nighter Amazon binge? Not likely. Money doesn’t grow on trees!

Agreed.

 

BUT…in all seriousness, if this isn’t you – and you’re feeling a little frustrated, overwhelmed, or underwater with the stuff in your space and could (maybe) use a few super simple, and very helpful pointers – I’m your man. 😉

Evan Zislis is a professional organizer, bestselling author of ClutterFree Revolution: Simplify Your Stuff, Organize Your Life & Save the World, and a sarcastic S.O.B. For hands-on assistance simplifying your stuff and organizing your life, call 970.366.2532, email Evan@MyIntentionalSolutions.com, or join the revolution at www.Facebook.com/ClutterFreeRevolution. www.ClutterFreeRevolution.com.

 

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